Funny Ha Ha and Funny Weird

The definition funny can be humour - causing laughter or amusement  or difficult to explain or understand, strange or odd. What kind of jokes are these? Are they funny ha ha or funny weird?  Or both? I have some good news and some bad news,” says a doctor to a patient after an operation. “OK, tell me the bad one first,” says the patient shakily. “You see, once we started operating, there were complications and we had to amputate both of your arms.” “Oh no! What’s the good news then?” “Do you see that stunningly beautiful nurse over there? She just agreed to be my wife!” Patient to his doctor: “Doctor, please help me. I think I’m a moth.” The doctor says: “I’m sorry, but I’m not your guy. You have to go see a psychiatrist.” The patient sighs: “I wanted to. But the light in your office is so much brighter!” A patient runs out of the operation room, screaming.  A doctor stops him and asks: “What on Earth is happening?! Why are you running?!” The patient breathes heavily: “I was about to be operated on, doctor. And then the nurse said: ‘Come now, stop panicking. You’ll manage just fine!’” The doctor shrugs: “Oh but that’s nice, no? Nurse being supportive to you?” The patient gets angry: “She was talking to the surgeon!”   Artery: The study of fine paintings Bacteria: Back door to cafeteria Barium: What doctors do when patients die Catscan: Searching for kitty Cauterize: Made eye contact with her Coma: A punctuation mark. D&C: Where Washington is Enema: Not a friend ER: The things on your head that you hear with Fester: Quicker than someone else Genes: Blue denim slacks G.I. Series: World Series of military baseball Hemorrhoid: A male from outer space The rest of the alphabet is HERE.  Carol asks what the blossoms were in yesterday's picture.  We see today that they are Crepe Myrtle.  The lily flower is Belladona Lily, followed by the familiar Queen Anne's Lace.

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All-Woman Spaceflight

It's an all-woman spaceflight that's in the news.  Is this a big deal?  I find out it is.  There have been 420 spacewalks and at least one man has taken part in every one of them. Astronauts Christina Koch and Jessica Meir are the two woman to carry out a spacewalk today.  Koch was supposed to do a spacewalk with another female crewmate in March. But NASA had to scrap the plan just a few days in advance because there wasn’t enough time to get a second medium-size spacesuit ready. The second medium was put together on board in June. So while there have been 420 spacewalks, Koch became the 14th woman to walk in space last March 29 when she and crewmate Nick Hague worked to install the second set of solar array batteries.   A total of 565 people have gone to space from over 38 countries. One source says 40 and the Atlantic article says 60 American women have flown in space. The first woman flew into space in 1963 - a Soviet.  A number of American women underwent the astronaut selection process in the early 1960s - and passed. They were not eligible to be astronauts: All astronauts were required to be military test pilots, a career not available to women at the time. NASA opened the space program to female applicants in 1978, in response to the new anti-discrimination laws of the time. Sally Ride became the first female US astronaut to go into space in 1983.  At the time, the press asked her questions about her reproductive organs and whether she would cry if things went wrong on the job.  Things have improved since then. So this turns out to be a big deal and worth noting in the press. The Atlantic has an article on why there were so few women in space - it is HERE. Where is this blossom-strewn path?  In the Sacramento Cemetery.  This was a wonderful highlight of the visit.

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Because I Said So... and More

Wake Up on the Bright Side 

It's a good day to have a good day


It is especially a good day when we get to read the funny things we say.  I found some great examples from children.  There are a number of websites, facebook and instagram pages that accumulate stupid/cute things my children/I as a child have said/done.

"When my oldest was 5, I was pregnant. I found out I was having a boy and we excitedly told our son he was having a brother. He started crying. Through the tears he asked, 'if you have a boy who will I marry when I grow up?' We had to explain a lot of things that day."

"Me: Can you tidy your room please!?!

4 year old son: But I'm playing a game...and in the game, this ain't my room.
 

"Before going to bed

Me: Did you brush your teeth?

Child: Yes

Me: Tonight ?

Child: .....Oh...I thought you meant last night."

Adults don't think they say dumb things to their children.  But in fact, common parental expressions seem to be dumb. Huffington Post has categorized them for more entertainment:

The Illogical:

• This hurts me more than it hurts you
• Because I said so
• When I was your age
• Money doesn't grow on trees
• One day you'll thank me
• If you want to act like a child, I'll treat you like one
• Quiet down, I can't even hear myself think

The Logical:

• Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
• If your friends told you to jump off a bridge, would you do it too?

The Threatening:

• Do you want a spanking?
• Wait till your dad/mom gets home
• Stop crying or I will give you something to cry about
• I am going to count to three

The Sarcastic:

• Are your legs broken?
• Oh, Jen's mom lets her do (such and such)?  Then go live with Jen's mom...I'll help you pack
• Shut the door, were you born in a barn?

Where do these expressions come from - how old are they?  It seems it is easier to find out the origins of common cat and dog sayings than parenting sayings and their origins.

Here are some of the things I found out.  I retrieved a cartoon of Soviet leader Nikita Khrushchev as a dentist about to extract Cuban leader Fidel Castro's teeth, drawn as missiles with the expression:  This hurts me more than it hurts you. HERE.

Ask a stupid question and you'll get a stupid answer - that was  found in Oliver Goldsmith's play She Stoops to Conquer (1773) and became popular thereafter.

Stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about - This retrieves a site that offers to translate it into Spanish.  Perhaps Spain considers this a useful expression.

Because I said so retrieves "Get a Because I said so! mug for your daughter in law Jovana."  

Our Sacramento layout today shows how the rock face has been modelled and then the close-up of the train as it travels over the bridge.